My usual Thursday evening football antics have been cancelled tonight because the all weather pitch is frozen. I hope you can all see the irony there. Anyway, I’m back in the freezing cold garage, but my spark plug tools have arrived. However, I’m outraged to find that the 12mm socket doesn’t quite fit down the access shaft. That’s incredible – the correct tool must have an incredibly narrow socket.

I’m a bit peeved by this, so as a last resort I elect to travel to St. Johns (only about a mile away) and knock on the door of a man I’d found on the internet who also owns an E30 M3 and a 330d. Surely a being who has made such a wise car selection could only be willing to help? There’s only one way to find out…

I knew his name was Craig, and fortunately he answers the door and answers to said name. He also recalls our brief on-forum conversation for a couple of weeks back. I look like a right urchin in my filthy garage clothes, but Craig takes me seriously, and says I’m more than welcome to borrow his spark plug tool, but it’s in the car which is at his mother’s house. Another similarity! We trundle there and back in my derv-burner and I’m stunned by the fantastic condition of his sport evo. He mentions he has a spare set of 16″ wheels he’s looking to sell and my wallet has a heart attack. It’s only a matter of time, especially as my spare has a bit of damage.

Armed with Craig’s spark plug tool I get back in the garage and pull the plugs. With the correct weaponary it’s so easy. The plugs indicate that the engine has been running a bit rich:

I also note with rage that the new spark plugs that ECP have given me are wrong. These are the second set of wrong plugs. Tossers. I’ll be off to BMW at the weekend them – hopefully they can get it right!

Determined to achieve something today I turn to the fuel filter. I assume this is at the rear of the car, and so go through the painful process of getting the rear of the car on axle stands in a narrow garage in the freezing cold. This done, I get under there, trace everything, and find it’s actually at the bottom of the engine bay. I start to change it from the top, and then have to get underneath, where because of the angle of the car I have about half an inch between my eyeball and the gearbox, but after much swearing that job at least is successfully done. Good!

While the car is in the air I swap the spare with the damaged wheel. The damaged wheel is perfectly serviceable and has better tread, so I’ll run that for a bit and sling the worn Uniroyal’d wheel in the 330d boot – I’ll get another Potenza on that when I can.